Growing up in a town of four precincts and very little police, things overall were calm. With the anti war protests of the 60's, hippies, civil rights issues and the killing of MLK and Bobbie Kennedy the force grew to full time. From one full timer to ten.
Eight out of the ten and the Chief were good guys. I used to visit for hours and talk with a few favorites. The Chief nicknamed me, "Sport."
We had a gay guy in class and we didn't give a damn. We thought of a clean environment and always picked up after ourselves. Marijuana was in use with beer. We wanted Love and peace. Not war.
Things become more militaristic. And LSD, then cocaine and much else seemed to flow in. The newer young generation didn't like blacks and litter became a new game. Love did turn aggressive and the music of the eighties, as music always does, slipped into a new era. The social discourse of music of the 60's and 70's turned into abandonment and fun. Neighbors and communities were ignored and front porches turned into back decks.
Life become more ambiguous with feelings and opinions bursting into the look of fireworks going every which way in sound, look and color.
For me, I sought balance and tune. The voice of Taoism and Buddhism helped immensely. I looked to ride the wave and lose punching and kicking in all directions. The last ten years unfurled an increase in life's complex problems and my meditation began to stutter. Unsettling emotions gained ground.
Then came the TBI. Traumatic Brain Injury. A kick in the balls that went straight to the head. Or visa versa. In my first year of recovery (?) focus was a big issue. As I began to read again or at least attempt to find things I could read with interest beyond a sentence or two, politics and social problems grabbed me by the short hairs. A replica of youth memories with a greater (in my view) control, bullshit and media manipulation of the American government. Anger and sickness due to the times became my rudder while love and compassion appeared as a delusion.
It still does.
Brain injury is complicated enough without adding the piles of shit which we have no control over. The industrial complex after WWII had us enter Korea, Vietnam and into the Middle East and beyond. Looking at world history as we know it none of this is new.
Looking for peace? Seek it out. Nurture it.
Then came the TBI. Traumatic Brain Injury. A kick in the balls that went straight to the head. Or visa versa. In my first year of recovery (?) focus was a big issue. As I began to read again or at least attempt to find things I could read with interest beyond a sentence or two, politics and social problems grabbed me by the short hairs. A replica of youth memories with a greater (in my view) control, bullshit and media manipulation of the American government. Anger and sickness due to the times became my rudder while love and compassion appeared as a delusion.
It still does.
Looking for peace? Seek it out. Nurture it.
No comments:
Post a Comment